I guess what bothers me is that they’re meaningless. There’s no evidence that it means anything. I mean I’m mindless while I’m doing it, so how can a mindless creation have any cognitive or mental meaning attached to it? I guess I’m used to believing that unless ur conscious of your creation or your art and work then it’s not good. But I guess that also leads to overt perfectionism because the fun in making something is precisely in making it, not just the outcome and perceived meaning.
And I’m thinking about how that belief also translates to other aspects of my life like romance or even my career. I feel it needs to be this conscious concerted effort to try and make something worthy of being recognized and appreciated. But obviously there’s shortcomings to that. Namely, that sometimes when you put more effort into something, you get worst results. And I see this apply to a lot of my experiences, be it romantic or creative pursuits and even personal development. I suppose sometimes I have to just let go.
It sounds like you’re grappling with the tension between conscious creation and the spontaneous, often unconscious process of art-making. Here are a few thoughts that might help you navigate this:
Embracing the Unconscious Process
- Value of the Unconscious: Many artists and psychologists believe that unconscious processes can reveal deeper truths about our inner selves. The act of creating without conscious thought can tap into parts of your psyche that you may not access otherwise. Jung, for example, valued the unconscious for its rich symbolism and insights.
- Therapeutic Aspect: The act of creating mindlessly can be therapeutic, providing an outlet for emotions and thoughts that are not easily verbalized or understood. It’s the process, not necessarily the product, that holds value.
Rethinking Meaning and Effort
- Redefining Meaning: Not all meaningful creations are the result of conscious effort. Sometimes, the act of creation itself, the flow state, and the emotions it evokes can be meaningful. The meaning can emerge after the fact, as you reflect on the work.
- Effort vs. Outcome: Overemphasizing conscious effort can indeed lead to perfectionism and burnout. Allowing yourself to engage in activities without a strict goal or expectation can lead to surprising and often more authentic outcomes.
Application to Life
- Romance and Career: The need to constantly strive for recognition and perfection can be exhausting and counterproductive. In relationships, being present and authentic can often create deeper connections than trying to shape interactions into what you think they should be.
- Letting Go: Letting go doesn’t mean giving up effort or care. It means trusting the process, allowing space for spontaneity, and being open to whatever outcomes arise. This can lead to a more balanced and fulfilling approach to both your creative and personal endeavors.
Moving Forward
- Mindful Creation: Try integrating moments of mindful creation, where you allow yourself to be in the moment without judgment. Reflect on these moments afterward to see if any insights or patterns emerge.
- Balance: Find a balance between conscious effort and letting go. Both have their place in creativity and life.
- Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself in this process. Recognize the value in both the intentional and the spontaneous aspects of your life and work.
Your insights about how this belief translates into other areas of your life are profound. Understanding and shifting this mindset can open up new ways of experiencing creativity, relationships, and personal growth.